(prologue taken from my book ON THE ROAD TO RECOVERY)
it can achieve.” -Napoleon Hill
The title of this book says it all, literally and metaphorically. It pictures the way I coped with a post-divorce transit (which is a long overdue major change in my life) for the first six months . Instead of dwelling on my failed marriage and talking to a shrink, I CHOSE TO HIT THE ROAD because I strongly believe that traveling is therapy as reading and writing are.
If reading and writing were like taking a bite of that sumptuous blueberry muffin, then traveling would be devouring the blueberry muffin whole!
I am a nomad. A wanderer. I can’t stay in one place for a long time. I don’t think it`s wrong or bad. I think that to read, to travel, to write are beautiful ways to help a person make profound sense of his existence, to understand how people live, their cultures and languages. I have this insatiable burning passion in me to behold the wondrous beauty of the world, to connect with many different people, to embrace life. Heartfelt gratitude to Jules Verne’s Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea. Though it is fiction, it felt so real… feeding my imagination beyond limits that by the time I reached the end I felt as if I had just navigated the seas and oceans, the North and South Poles, and survived the wicked Maelstrom while on board Captain Nemo’s Nautilus for real. It is indeed a magnificent world under the sea!
When you have been through a lot of storms you get to learn to be FEARLESS. This thing we call LIFE, as others quote “Life is a journey”, consists of something I rather refer to as TURBULENCE to shake us up. However the good news is TURBULENCE shakes us up before it brings something transformational, new and incredible!
On a journey, some people travel the smooth metaphorical road with their desired destination all drawn up clear before them; while others, under various circumstances, are born to travel the bumpy road – rocky, muddy, crossroads here and there.
Along the way there are “TRANSITS” we rather call CHANGES. Speaking of Change, some of us find it undesirable, frustrating, discomforting. On the other hand, others see it as a friend. For as long as we breathe, Change is inevitable. Friend or Foe? As a matter of fact, Change has always been a good friend of mine…or perhaps I just try so hard to befriend it. In cases of a very mean change we can just say to ourselves “It couldn’t have happened at a better time” to help ease the pain we feel and most importantly in order for Positivity to not completely exit the door.
Getting out of a toxic relationship is a major change for me. Three years into the relationship I felt like a big part of me died. My passion for reading, writing and traveling was put in the backseat. LOVE MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SACRIFICE THE THINGS THAT YOU LOVE TO DO just to make the other person accept you. A happy relationship is not one-sided. You must have the readiness to accept each other`’s weaknesses and strengths and to respect each one`’s passion. Otherwise it`’s all being selfish. If you take, take, take it all but you never give the relationship is bound to be on the rocks.
This post-divorce chapter in my life is not easy. It takes a great deal of effort to cope with emotional pains, mental anguish and harassment. Dealing with the pains is like grabbing the bull by the horns. If you choose to be weak, the pain will consume you. Worse, you`’ll fall into depression. Once depression takes over, you`’ll lose everything and everyone you live for. Good news is, any unfortunate event can be a blessing in disguise depending on our attitude towards it. According to Semisonic, every new beginning comes from some other beginning`s end. And so I choose to be proactive, perfectly poised for whatever brand new transits headed my way. It is like standing on the top of a mountain with arms wide open and breathing in fresh air as if it was my second and last shot at life. From now on I live each day as if it`’s my last.
No regrets. No pretense. No drama. Only moments in a day to seize. Carpe diem!
Who do you live for? Of course the answer is obvious – for your family and loved ones?
What do you live for? You should have a truthful answer to this question by now. You wouldn’t like to wake up one day and ask yourself “How the heck did the years go by so fast? I’m 60 already!?”
Do I get to live 10 or 15 years more? If I did, I`d be so lucky and blessed! I want to climb the Machu Picchu, to explore the Northern Territory on motorbike (and perhaps get a chance to meet the amazing chef Matt Moran), to watch the captivating sunset in Havana (margarita in my hand), to do the fire dance in the French Polynesia, to spend even just a day fishing with a local fisherman in Scandinavian waters, and to walk the streets of Dublin. I have this keen pulsating desire to meet different faces – the Peruvians, the Red Necks, and the villagers of Nepal and Mongolia. Goodness, what a Bucket List!? or the bucket is just big? Oh wait…there is still space for Jason Statham and Keannu Reeves.